Round One: Fertility Treatments

Here we go again. As some of you may already know or have read in past posts, we have been trying for another baby. We struggled with fertility in getting pregnant with Delilah but for some reason, maybe just wishful thinking, I thought that it would be an easier process this time around. I was actually very surprised month after month when I was not pregnant. I thought that we had it all figured out this time around. I have been relatively calm and relaxed and much less emotional throughout this process this time. However, with each passing month, it becomes a little more heartbreaking and fears of not being able to have another baby set in. This past month, I found myself breaking down. It didn't last long since I was hiding in the bathroom so Delilah didn't see me cry and now that she can open doors she came running in and gave me a big hug and a kiss and before I knew it I was laughing hysterically on the bathroom floor with my sweet baby girl. 

Yesterday, my Dr. labeled me with unexplained infertility again. This label makes me crazy. There has to be an explanation and I am determined to figure it out. My body was made to carry children and I will carry another baby. My Dr. explained to me that it is time to start fertility treatments again. I said absolutely everything to try and change his mind or talk him out of it but he feels strongly that this is what we need to do. I love my Dr. and I have full trust in him but my last experience with fertility drugs was not a pleasant one. I don't even like to take 1 Advil for an aggressive migraine. If there is a way that is drug free, that's the way for me. These drugs are aggressive and the side effects are awful. My prescription was called in and it is sitting in a bag waiting for me to pick it up. I am set to start my first round on Monday. If I do not start on Monday, I will have to wait another month. I keep going back and forth in my mind on if I want to just get started and stop putting off the inevitable, or if I want to give it one more month in hopes that a miracle will happen. 

To be continued.